kirastar

why always i so down no longer a smile

2010-01-22T05:17:00.000-08:00

today was my sad day ever.i won't foregt it make me feel so down and acting that i am ok
in my true heart.today after night shift if i faster go get the returns things won't happen.
and was blame badly.. i don't mind i keep it as my lesson but it keep repeat make me
harm feel down........and when i go office i try to tell them that if the things has change.pls inform and never tell me i was stand by to 2nd task.
cos i was remind to info if i work have to inform my supervisor and info to the leader then they clock me in as work..and that i was tease. So down look down and just walk alway avoid friend wanna be alone...and chaught by rain...when i was on my way home .i went out with friends to buy cloths in the afternoon. i was so happy^^ but in the end i came home see my parent face and just wann play game. went start to battle keep calling me i so angry then i speak loud..i head ppl talking to me when i was battle feild i just can't pause a game cos is online...
and yet will make me head them more... why am i like that why can't i do thing right i have been thinking

2010-01-09T19:20:00.000-08:00

The time have have been run to fast.. and i wan to restart a of blg as 2010 from now!

it is been 12 years i have miss my pri school friends...and the most is somebody that i have like her alot in my mind. i know that it is hard to said that. i like her the most i can;t really forget about her. this feww days i have thinking about her can't forget it at all..i have been try sending some msg for the past year till now no reply at all.

2008-05-30T07:00:00.000-07:00

haiz.. it be a long time never c my blog miss my old friends
i now serve ns in poa so boring hiaz...is a board day haha
but most of the time kena bully very depress i knew i always alone...
time run so fast few more months i going pop soon ^>^

2008-02-29T08:08:00.000-08:00

it been a long time i never update my blog .... many things have happen yet....
i never , ever been a good way of being a good friends......
something else told me to give up let the darkness cover me off... just head out and die....
i really don't understand wat i been throught..... loves some 1 and yet ppl take alway
feel so dishearted......last time during my end of secondary i make a promise...
leave my friend alone be myseft won't ever meet them agian but yet i break the promise.....
...i still can't find out why i break my promise 5 points jealous,angry ,sadness,hopeless,uncareness

but this feel weeks i leave flp finding my reason....
have i waste my money during bus fair the ans is yes my brother was right i adult le having
so stressbut earn more money for my bus ... fair if not i can't go anywhere but most of the things
i don't care aslong as i really wan to work i work

let it be a darkness

2007-10-02T19:19:00.000-07:00

This days feel unhappy and make alot of jealous=;= , but i feel so lonely....
n wat i promise i can't do it wat i love i can't love it...feel so down everyday
i really wan end myself le...i just hiding something.....that i never said just
beacuse it is too late and makes me jealous about it...

i never notice wat i love wat i like
is just a darkness be on me and have a bad dream last night dream that i was aim by a gun
but i just easy to snatch always this is wat i dream can't said more about this is just a meaningless.......

i only know how to help u guys settle some problem that u all have i just nothing...u all treat me transparent i treat u all my best friends.. this is the way i have, the way i like ,the only way to said pls stop it all ur cutie face to me is part of my weakness it make me fall in love with u
i wish to forget it...u all wan to know y i seldom happy right is all the reason here...hope u all understand......

2007-09-28T00:07:00.000-07:00

Time have run very fast i feel so sad every time... many things have happen to me..1 is my beloved grandfather have pass alway 2 weeks ago i i so sad and cry...in my heart i feel that so sry to him.....because that i seldom talk to him and make me feel so sad and can't understand his feeling....but now i do understand he really like me alot seen i was a little.....it just i have been change alot when i was in pri school i started to hate alot of ppl and now i realize i not a bad after all....i know is too late but i will be always protect watever i came for..

and i do love someone seen i was in sec 3 but i can't even know is it really my love is there or not i feel that i feel in my dream when i see it.... can't even tell her how much i like her but can said that i will be just beside u and cheer u up u never know and always see u so sad but really wan to an wei ni.....if u c this maybe is too late i may lose everything i had before....

2007-08-29T17:12:00.000-07:00

That tuesday after school something bad going on to me haiz..
i am so sad still.. It happen like this, when go home that time
it was raining my friend johnson need me to bring him to bus stop
and i asked my friend kuma i bring johnson to go bus stop.. i will wait for you there
and he ans back u go 1st.....nvm u go 1st... but i said i will wait for you at bus stop....then i walk off so when reaching the bus stop i tell johnson u go 1st i wait for kuma so my friends and i was waiting....for him so i call him he never ans
my call and thought something happen and i call 3 times and saw him...walking up the bus stop...then suddenly he walk down i call agian still never ans my call i call raymond to call him......and then he ans then i was a bit angry but i forgive him i know he will give reason then nvm but he was angry too beacuse he asked me go 1st...haiz...
when go home time i never think about it beacuse i was thinking wat present to send kexin birthday... erm so i went to jurong point to buy present around 5 plus so i when to comic shop to buy aa cute present for her.. after buying present my friend call me 6pm must reach jurong east so i walk faster to take train when i reach i go meet wei yan 1st after that jia xian, yan ping, xui min
they all we start the plan go imm but present and cake for her.. then yan ping will meet her 1st ya...so i also heard that kexin was sad and i actually wan to call her to make her happy...but i never beacuse wan to make her a big suprise
then when we reach imm around 6 :15 jia xian and i buy present ... xui min and wei yan buy cake after that we meet togather... then wew for got to buy lighter so i faster when down and go buy lighter....and i take lift to 5 floor to get prepare every thing so we waited for her around 7:55 she reach so the candle xui min light up and jia xian when down to fetch her but too early then we blow off 1st haha... but jian xian call le so we faster light up but that time the lighter was hard to light up so i light ther canndle faster but i burn my tumb a bit but never mind is kexin birthday so she reache le was a surpreise
we sing birthday song for her and she make a wish..... and blow the canndle
and she cry is her 1st time clebrate with friends...so was very happy we cut the cake togather too haha and she feed us and give us a hug lols we was happy that day night and we take some photos togather.. too after that we go home.....
kexin, wei yan, jia xian we take the same bus... togather and we said good bye cya tmr haha......

wednesday 29/8/2007
on wednesday when going to the lunch brake we going to go out side eat then it something happen that i was very up sad beacuse that he was still angry about the matter on tuesday... then my friends asked me what happen.. i ans back how i know i tell him every thing.....but then go canteen buy food eat fast and just walk alway and find a good place to convince myseft alone.... i feel like crying beacuse i don't even understand it after de brake ... selavm my teacher saw me soo moodly i nothing to said i just wan to be alonerin my darkneess so won't happen anything and johnson asked me wat happen
i said nt he said he know le so i can't take it i cry le selavm asked wat happen i slow de hp to johnson the blg,i put in my hp my teacher call me don't think about it don't thing too much... so watever it come watever is gone wat thing comes always gone no ppls will understand on this friendship i put i put my lift to it no matter wat happens i settle every thing go to me i settle i really wish to end myself ... but i never i love some 1 i also never said i care about them to me i am just a nothing in my life...

2007-08-19T07:49:00.000-07:00

feel so happy to make alots of friends...This feel days c like a peacefull days i have but i really can feel like i going to lost something els agian this time may be double.....I did wan to give up to let darkness to cover me i had enough
but i still have friends behind me cheering me not to give up,wat can i do for them.... i may have problems giving them....because of my jealous ,depress, and many more, i just wan to get it done to make others happy....i just wan to cut my acting.. my friends r right i just and act i may not de real me watever i said is just fake

2007-07-28T07:35:00.000-07:00

lots of things happen i very angry at 1 of my friends betrayer
asked him to change but he never said alot of bad things, out feel like really wan to weck him...
but i give 3 week to change to let him change is a last chance to him also tell my name to other ppl
i won't forgive his this type of attuide...i promise will give him hell if he still haven change...

2007-07-11T08:28:00.000-07:00

It have been along time never write my blog...alot of things have happen
and too many to said also i miss my friends alot exp my ex joan have been marrried last week
haiz.. it been too late to choi her and many hard times come i promise 1 of my friend no her i can
wanna improve my skill on my wangan and my studies.... but will promise i will forget her and act if i c her on celmenti act as a enemey to me.. is for me easy to avoide her/.\

2007-05-30T06:29:00.000-07:00

it has been a lot time never write my blog...and alot of thing happen to me
lots of friends problem and i fail my test agian this time was very bad...
don't know wat to be done also, my old buddy has a gf le so happy too him ya...
wish them all the best..and my own i will try my best to help others that always
need help

2007-03-22T07:18:00.000-07:00

This week so many things have happen.....haiz
is all bout friendship i willy don't know wat to do
getting to give up on them can't take it any more
this is de 1st time i realize that is same as me at primaray school....
last time i know y my friends hate me alot during the long pass years....

but now the all new friends come to our school and change our friends
and make us sperateways is a set up.. Today i also notice
that some 1 curse me i will use de curse back to them wait u c
i a make dam curse to them

2007-03-15T03:34:00.000-07:00

haiz.. today fail my test i am so sad wor some more teacher said
clue but never notice.....and when teacher go through de ans and
i said gust some ans to teacher and yet my friend jian ping laugh .I dam
angry at him just control my temple only, ppl make mistake and he laugh
he make mistake i help him talk to him and yet take everything from me
i relly dam angry at him make me sad only.........

2007-02-16T07:23:00.000-08:00

haiz... valentine days have over i have miss it agian i feel so sad can't find my ownself
wat am i have be thinking about some 1 that have love before won't be forget feel
so dishearted..........today i close my eye will think for her just wan to forget her and de names
i hate myseft in 1 and single day.....i don't have any ideas to help ppl just wan to give up
all my hopes and every thing chinese new 2 more day a head the time have run fast i willy don't wat to to do feel like wan to drop my tears but can't................can any1 tell me wat should aim for.........

2007-01-26T05:06:00.000-08:00

yesterday i send msg to my friend hope she reply but she never reply haiz.. so sad
i think now all my old friends will get far away from me... y this will happen to me
so sad mostly my friend won't like this....and i realize that i not the 1 who is a good
and caring person now manys things happen to me maybe i go to de wrong way this time
starting to scold my friend said bad things about him.. i don;t know wat am i doing no ppl will
understand my feeling....

2007-01-05T17:33:00.000-08:00

yesterday is my last day of attactment at daikin company 1 month so fast gone haiz..
hope i will there agian haha so happy at there ^^alots of things happen
.make alot of friend there too haha erm now
Chinese new year coming don't wat thing will happen this year

2006-12-22T19:15:00.000-08:00

This decmeber holiday i was woking at daikin i so happy working there lear someting
haha but alot of things happen this feel weeks,
i need to cheer up my 1 of the friend he very sad hehe and my i make alot of new friend in wmmt2 ......but i have give alot of problem to my old friend haiz...now adays i go out saw my friend nothing talk to them...just don't wat to said -.-"

2006-12-10T00:03:00.000-08:00

Finally know something i not a good team buddy i realise that i not active in myseft
i no point having a team..... i will just be alone that is wat i wan now forget every thing i had before just wan to forget is so min to mee.....be the 1 u r will forget the 1 u have before,
just u trust will just a fake that u did from now that call kira will be alonely person......

2006-11-26T01:45:00.000-08:00

Today i go out tithe my aunt pray god hehe ,erm also got my lots of thing haha.........
Today is a fine day feel so happy exam also comning near wor, also wan to wish my ite friend good luck and have a nice day............hope fully i can do help ba so borning now a days=.=....Nothing to do study only haiz....

Lost Of Hope

2006-11-22T05:40:00.000-08:00

Today i finally know that i too big mouth and just like this make a very big mistake
wat can i do it already happen....now my best friend head me alot le if i never tell ppl i won't be so sad now don't know wat to doi just like a shit.........and hopeless from tmr onwards i wan to be a lonely in darkness....

2006-11-20T06:25:00.000-08:00

today never done so much thing but my friend making me angry this afternoon
take my thing never asked who 1... i scold him bad word actually,i should not said that to him
but he force me to do... Lol exam getting near haiz.. i gona to study...=.=
this week maybe something will happens to me huh don't know wat to do feel not good this week but also can streess exam s=o near haiz...

2006-11-14T03:16:00.000-08:00

today i really really throught is my happy day,
i do my work and do my practical test so happy and yet when going
i chat with my friend about tmr test and take train with them.....but going to reach home time
my friend sms me it can call a sad news for me.. he said that he wan me out of the prk team it is agame at arcade call maximum tune i play so much and yet wan me give him back de card beacuse i too weak ......i so sad very fan...don't know wat to doi am just a stupid newbie that all...

2006-11-09T04:40:00.000-08:00

Today i do alot of practial work helping my friend teach them,
i so hapyy then i learn alot hehe... i go school so happy go home so sad
why this happens to me trying to be happy every day....maybe
i should seal back my soul that i should belong.....
The time has run so fast going to be 2007 i wish to be freedom
that my parents like to force me to study hard always make me streess....
haiz.. what can i do i hate my life.....

2006-10-27T06:37:00.000-07:00

Today i go play maximum tune hehe saw so many ppl
i feel happy that my evo8 car smoke is back hehe....
and my car today fly sia so good wait so long then finally fly hehe i like it^^
after that i went to my aunt until 8:30 went home...then my stupid father give me c the stupid letter that i can't explain then i said asked my cousin sis la then asked me explain in english he said he know then i scold him if i tell u, still don't undersand then said i scold bad word but i try to cool down amost got angry =.="can anybody tell me wat i should do always this happens to me i feel bad every day i kept my bad feeling never tell anybody...feel like dying better=.=

2006-10-19T05:04:00.000-07:00

today my practical so hard and kena socld by teacher haiz..
i so sad =.=so bad luck today haiz..taught that teacher won't shout at us 1 and today he show his true colour ......this feel weeks wheather still so bad^^lol
i have so many good friend to cheer me up and wan me to be happy, i just wanna thanks to u to u all^^hehe

2006-10-11T07:06:00.000-07:00

i so happy today i vs my friend rave...it is a friendly match 101 hehe but he to pro le
i too weak, i need t o train more hehe tmr is my brother birthday so happy haha

and my school start next week haiz... time run so fast de i miss my sec friend alot haha
this feel so haizz...but feel more days left going to rain very heavy lol i will wish my friend have a happy day

2006-10-06T07:01:00.000-07:00

these day wheather so bad huh.... so haizz .....
-.-day by day wating for a friend to reply my msg
and yet she never reply.....^^yen fen zeng na pon diao

2006-10-02T05:48:00.000-07:00

today feel so unhappy that i play mtune and lost very badly haiz.....
i don't know wat i doing also do so many wrong turn
tomorrow i must win back lol.....^+^

2006-09-29T06:32:00.000-07:00

haaha today i so happy that i have so many goods friend know about me
i today go jurong point play mtune vs my friend hehe i win him...hehe
his name call raymond but he improves some skill.....and today i have a call he also play mtune hehe i 1st time ppl said i so kind and won't get angry haha it depend on
the weather in my mind....

a happy day

2006-09-27T07:44:00.000-07:00

today is my happy day i play maximum tune2 car games, i get a very good title i was so happy
hehe ^_^ and today i saw my fromer friend alvin he also play mtune ......
today.... and now holiday i so board don't know wat thing to do......haha
i try to meet my friend when they free still wating for their reply haiz.....
i will miss my sec school teacher and my ncc friends plus classmates.........

fail my test i so sad and alone in school no ppl to chat

2006-09-22T06:03:00.000-07:00

today i have a pie test but i fail beacuse i can't chage my ans de test got problem
haiz....i so sad =.="and after school i help my friend do de display board and aroun 12 plus
they go home and i had to wait for teacher to call me to help him so i go take my lunch then
i waited till 1:30 so long i waited and i was board that time noo ppl to chat with....=.=

kira star

2006-09-12T06:43:00.000-07:00

i like to be happy every time... do alot of hard wrok in school^^i some time like to be childish hehe...
my teacher like me to help them.......do many thing

i got alot of best friend that can trust de most^^ and i like to play alot of game toothe most game i ilke is maximum tune 2 is a car game i most of the time go jp play.....